Escapades of an Evil Garden Gnome
by Autumn's.Reign
Summary: Inuyasha finds out the hard way that Evil Garden Gnomes are abundant in today's society... *Oneshot* *Slight InuxKagish, but not really*


**A/N:** Another one-shot I think could have been better…but, whatever. It was in my head. I had to release my one-shot butterfly…

(Also, I think I've made mistakes. If anyone spots 'em, I'd be glad if you could tell me about it. I can be a bit of a perfectionist with grammar sometimes…)

**Disclaimer:** Once upon a time there was a sad girl who didn't own Inuyasha. The end.

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**Escapades of an Evil Garden Gnome**

Inuyasha was whistling as he jumped from the lip of the well into Kagome's well house. It was a rare day indeed when Inuyasha was found whistling, it meant he was in a good mood, something which happened maybe once every six months or so. Give or take.

You might ask, with good cause, just why was he in a good mood today? Well, the sun was shining, they had collected almost all the Sacred Jewel shards and Naraku's death was imminent, but better than all that, he was here to bring Kagome back to the feudal era, and that thought alone was enough to make even the rainiest day bright.

There was an extra bounce to his step as he thought of his beloved Kagome. He was happy that he was to see her again. It had been entirely too long since they had last seen each other. Almost two days now. But they had felt like decades. A day was never a day without Kagome there to make it that much better. Smiling now as well as whistling, Inuyasha came level with Kagome's mother's garden bed.

He looked over the neat rows of home-grown vegetables and the pretty flower bushes encasing them appraisingly. It was rather nice, he had to say, for such a small amount of space, and they tasted as good as they looked. Many a time he had been unable to keep himself from eating a third helping of whatever treat Mrs. Higurashi had conjured from the delectable produce.

Sighing contently at the thought of more of that cooking, Inuyasha turned to enter the house when he saw something colourful at the corner of his vision. Curious despite his impatience, Inuyasha turned back to look at what had caught his sight.

It was a small man.

A _very_ small man.

Tilting his head to the side, Inuyasha assessed this small man. He was, indeed, tiny in comparison to himself; even the brat kitsune had to be taller than this fellow!

He tried to sniff the man's scent in the air, to help him pass judgment on the guy, but the smell of the garden was overpowering all else, so his scent was mixed in with that of the vegetables and flowers, making it indefinable.

He obviously posed no threat to Kagome or her family, so Inuyasha decided he wasn't an enemy. But, what was he doing in the garden bed? Surely he had something better to do than stand there all day in the sun?

"Old man, what are you doing?" He said as politely as he could, and was happy when he didn't sound nearly as gruff as he usually did. It had to be an effect of his good mood.

However, the man made no sign that he heard him. He simply continued to stand there, smiling in his unconcerned way, small glasses perched on his nose, unmoving and staring at some indefinable spot over Inuyasha's shoulder.

Creasing his brow, Inuyasha decided he had to be deaf, maybe blind as well, so he therefore needed to speak louder.

"What are you doing, old man?" he asked, louder, leaning in closer to the smiling face. "Can you hear me? Hello, old man?" And yet, still he received nothing but an oblivious smile and a continued ignorance of his presence.

Getting slightly angry now, Inuyasha leaned in even closer and almost yelled in the man's ear. "HELLO!? CAN YOU HEAR WHAT I AM SAYING? OLD MAN!?"

He tried to think of something. Now, he could be under some kind of spell. One of those ofuda's _had_ to have worked around here; Grandpa wasn't _that _useless, was he? But, the odds of that had to be slim. Magic wasn't so prominent around here in this age. No, it had to be something else.

But the only other reason had to be that he was purposefully ignoring Inuyasha! How insolent! Just when he was being polite to a stranger, they are rude right to his face! Inuyasha couldn't believe someone would be so inconsiderate! Even he would make an answer, but this old man wouldn't even acknowledge him!

Well, it was time he was taught a lesson, wasn't it?

Standing up to his fullest height, Inuyasha drew the Tetsueiga and pointed the tip at the old man, standing just as he had when Inuyasha chanced upon him.

"You will state your name and business here to me right this moment or your life is forfeit!" Inuyasha stated as regally as he could. He was being very harsh, he knew, but he was very angry right now, and a very angry Inuyasha reverts to drastic and reckless measures.

Squaring his shoulders, Inuyasha waited with patience he didn't know he possessed for the old fellow to answer.

Minutes ticked by, and no answer came. But still, Inuyasha waited. He wanted a response. And he would wait.

A few more minutes passed, and yet, nothing.

Inuyasha stared right into the cheerful face of the colourful old man and huffed. He just stood there. Smiling. In his red coat and blue hat. Smugly.

You could almost see Inuyasha snap in anger.

With a roar of anger, Inuyasha swung the Tetsueiga at the old man. "Wind Scar!" and with the familiar burst of yellow light, the attack swept past the carefully planted and cared-after garden to the unsuspecting garden gnome, obliterating him forever.

Smirking at the death of the stupid fool who dare ignore him, Inuyasha turned, once again, to the door of the Higurashi household, where his smirk abruptly faltered and faded at the outraged expression on his beloved Kagome's face.

Inuyasha opened his mouth to speak, but before he could get a word in, Kagome exploded. "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!?"

Inuyasha flattened his ears to his skull in the hopes of blocking the worst of her screech from his sensitive appendages.

"YOU-YOU DESTROYED MY MOTHERS GARDEN!" she screamed, marching furiously up to him and poking her finger into his chest for emphasis.

"I what?" He said dumbly, and his eyes opened when he saw the mess the he had in fact made of the garden. "I…hadn't meant to do that…" He said sheepishly, scratching the back of his head.

"YOU WHAT!?" Kagome bellowed. "I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU MEANT TO DO! YOU DID IT! AND YOU DESTROYED MY MOTHER'S FAVORITE GARDEN KNOME!"

"What's a 'garden gnome'?" Inuyasha asked stupidly.

"That little man that you smashed to pieces with the Wind Scar!" Kagome answered angrily. "Look what you've done! All that time mum spent on the garden! It took ages for her to grow stuff in that! What am I going to tell her? Oh, no." Kagome wringed her hands in helplessness and started muttering to herself.

Inuyasha, however, barely noticed her muttered words. He had realised something, he had done something very stupid. Oops? "A garden gnome? Like I knew what it was!"

Deciding on a plan to make this all better again, Kagome turned to Inuyasha once more, determination set firmly in her expression.

"You, Inuyasha, are going to apologize to mum, re-plant her garden and help her tend it for the next two months!" she said forcefully. Noticing he was about to say something, Kagome hastily spoke before him. "And no complaining, you're doing it!" Also, for good measure: "Sit boy!"

And so with that, Kagome left Inuyasha on the garden floor, eating dirt and cursing that he had ever seen that damned gnome, with us all thinking: good days are just too be true with Inuyasha.

**END! **


End file.
